After I separated from the military and we moved and such, my oldest kid was getting to the age where he was going to need something. I grew up doing martial arts in the form of Kenpo Karate, and I recalled all the benefits that came from those years of training as a kid. I first started my search with what I knew, American Kenpo. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much out there, and in the time that lapsed since I was last in the Karate circuit, a lot of that culture has either swung towards super traditional or super McDojo-y. I wasn’t liking what I was seeing, so I broadened my search for kid’s martial arts in my areas. After filtering through all the Taekwondo and other McDojo and cheesy, stuck in the 80’s looking joints, I landed on our academy.
I actually had read the reviews of a couple BJJ gyms in our areas, as I was exposed to a little Jiu-Jitsu in the military, so after scrolling through the broader search, I was leaning towards that option. I had it narrowed down to three or four options by the time I hit the reviews. One of the gyms my wife had contacted because she was interested in one of their programs, but they ended up giving her a bad first impression, so that one was crossed out. Between the two I was really deciding between there was one review on each that sealed the deal.
One gym had a review that they were very competition focused and that if your kid wasn’t on the competition team, they were pretty much neglected and used as grappling dummies. The other had a review that there was no emphasis on competing and that the coaches played no favorites. I was sold and we signed up for a trial class.
Now, I recall from my martial arts experience, that the biggest notable benefit for me as a kid was the discipline I learned from it. Between that and the obvious learning self-defense, I wasn’t completely quite aware of the benefits my son and daughter would glean from training Jiu-Jitsu. It’s evident now, and I’m glad we made the choice when we did.
I’ve shared my thoughts plenty on the self-discipline you can learn from training Jiu-Jitsu, and how that carries over into your everyday lives. The same goes for kids. The best part of training Jiu-Jitsu is that many of the benefits, such as self-disciple have tangible results almost immediately. Seeing my kids’ disciple grow and flourish was motivating for us as parents to keep them going as long as they wanted to.
Another nearly immediate benefit of Jiu-Jitsu is the learning self-defense. I remember getting into situations as a kid where talking was no longer working. I was backed into a corner and my opponent was intent on throwing blows. This fight ended with a swift roundhouse kick to his head. Likewise, my oldest already has used his Jiu-Jitsu in order to subdue a bully. A kid was picking on another, and the violence of the situation was escalating. It got to the point where my son distracted the bully, shot a double leg, mounted and pinned the bully to the ground until a teacher came and handled the situation. My son received no punishment (the school didn’t even bother to tell us he was in such a scuffle) for his actions. Not only had Jiu-Jitsu taught my son how to protect himself, but also how to protect others. For that, I am grateful.
With that ability to defend oneself, there comes a level of confidence. Now, this confidence has to be controlled but having that confidence is warranted. I for one don’t walk around thinking I can beat up anybody that crosses my path, but I do know I’m going to give 95% of those people a run for their money. I’m pretty sure my kids walk around with at least that mentality. I do however make sure to keep them in their place, because too much of that confidence could end up being hazardous.
Before my son started Jiu-Jitsu, I’ll be honest, he seemed like he was a little chunky, clunky and goofy in his own body. When we’d play sports in the yard, or just were running around at the park, there were plenty of times I thought how un-athletic he looked, even in comparison with kids his age. Something I didn’t quite understand from my limited exposure to Jiu-Jitsu was the level of body awareness you would develop. After watching my son grow up in Jiu-Jitsu, it was evident that he was growing in awareness of his body. The evidence was even there off the mats. When he was out playing, you could tell that he had a new athletic ability. He was moving better and looked just as awkward as any of the other kids out there playing.
Finally, there comes the benefit of strength. In all honesty, my biggest complaint of the kids program is that they seldom get on the kids to correct their form when it comes to warm up exercises. 99.9% of the kid’s pushups, squats and even some of their Jiu-Jitsu movements are straight trash. So I supplement that at home, and we’re working on growing physically stronger as a family. But there is a mental strength that develops through Jiu-Jitsu. I notice that the problem for kids is relating those skills to everyday life. They develop these profound skills of problem solving, being comfortable in uncomfortable positions, and working through and under pressure, but for some reason they can’t quite grasp how to apply those mental skills when they are faced with a difficult homework assignment or they goof up a task we’ve given them. Again, we, as parents try to supplement this at home, and relate problems they face on the mat to problems they face in everyday life. I hope we’ll soon see the reward from this benefit, but it’s definitely still in development.
My final thought would be that if you have kids and they aren’t training martial arts, I would highly encourage you to consider it. It’s a fun, safe and ultra-beneficial practice to teach your kids life skills that they will likely carry for decades to come. I know I have from training Kenpo decades ago, and I know I will carry forward lessons from my time in Jiu-Jitsu now.
Thanks for reading.
Thinking Through Jiu-Jitsu 