How Easily We Can Fall Away

So, a while back I wrote about finally getting my friend to try out Jiu-Jitsu. It was a story of persistent pursuit that led to him signing on at our academy. It was a great victory for expanding the cult… I mean… growing our tribe.

But here’s the problem. That was the point where I stopped being persistent. I’d check in on him, but our work schedules seemed to be opposite of each other for the next month or so. So, there was no in person accountability. There was one morning class he asked if I would be at, and unfortunately, that was the one morning class that I wouldn’t be at that week. I’m pretty sure he didn’t go.

And if you can’t tell, I’m not putting the blame on him. I’m taking ownership of the lapse in my persistence. I stopped pursuing him because I thought the race had been won. He signed on. He paid money. He had the bug. But he hadn’t developed the habit of going that leads to the discipline to continue. He had been motivated, but lacked the discipline necessary to keep on it.
But don’t get me wrong, if the roles were reversed, I’d be the one taking ownership of my lapse in attendance. I’d be looking at my excuses and thinking what a pitiful lump I was being. But the roles aren’t reversed. I’m still going on a regular basis, even when I don’t feel like it. I still show up to morning class after a 12-hour shift. I still go on the nights I’d rather sit at home and crack a beer or two. I’ve taken ownership of my Jiu-Jitsu journey.

It really got me thinking about just how easily we can fall away from the things in our life that are good for us. In this instant, it was his skipping a class or two. That is the worst thing you can do, especially at the beginning. Once you skip a class or two, it is a struggle to get back out there. It becomes a compounded excuse. It becomes a procrastination. You start to think to yourself, “I already missed two classes this week, I’ll start fresh next week.” But that proverbial “next week” never actually comes.

It can happen in our faith, too. I’ve seen a very similar situation. A couple, young in their faith journey, started attending church regularly. But there was one Sunday they opted to head to the beach instead. And then the excuses would pile on. “Well, we already missed the first message in this series, so we’ll catch it at the start of the next one.” And sooner or later the beach becomes the focus of their worship.

Now, don’t hear what I’m not saying. There can be fruit from skipping out of corporate worship from time to time. But not to merely do worldly thing. There are times that a family may need to do church as an individual family unit, and that’s fine. It’s good. It’s biblical. But it’s equally good to be around a body of believers. To be involved with Christ’s bride, the Church.

But more so in our Jiu-Jitsu journey, it’s necessary to be around other Jiu-Jitsu people. Have you tried doing Jiu-Jitsu alone? It doesn’t quite hit the same, and I’d say it is impossible to grow and advance by yourself.
This may be a weird connection, but that’s what this blog is about, thinking on those weird connections and putting them down on (digitized) paper.

Anyways, what’s the lesson? What’s the takeaway?

Well, from where I’m standing, it all boils down to ownership. It all boils down to taking responsibility. Both of our own lives and of our duty to others. Here’s what I mean. By being persistent and getting my friend to dip his toe into the world of Jiu-Jitsu, I signed a non-verbal, non-written agreement with him. I had become his Jiu-Jitsu accountability partner. I was his Jiu-Jitsu sponsor. It was my unspoken duty to help him along in his journey, answer questions, work on the fundamentals, and most importantly, offer accountability. And I failed him.

So, it’s time to get back on that persistence wagon. It’s time to bombard him with Jiu-Jitsu memes and gifs and asking when the next class he’s going to is. Inviting him along, offering to drive, or telling him I’ll buy him ice cream… whatever it takes to get him to go consistently until he develops the habit of going. And once that habit is set, slowly ween him off and see if that habit is set enough for him to go on his own.

I know that Jiu-Jitsu is going to be good for him, I know he knows it is good for him. It’s just working on building his habits. Making it part of his life. If I’ve heard it once, I’ve heard it a thousand times- Jiu-Jitsu isn’t a hobby, it’s a lifestyle. That’s where he needs to get. He needs to get from it being something he does to Jiu-Jitsu being something that is part of his life.

Here’s my bottom line: Go to Church and go to Jiu-Jitsu. They’re good for you.

Thanks for reading.